Do I sound bitter? Do I sound desperate? I do. I know I do. And I can’t blame you for that. That’s on me. I’ve learned that lesson. You did not make me bitter. You did not make me desperate.
I just thought it was going really well. We talked for weeks. Things progressed so nicely. You recommended books to me for crissake. How great is that? That’s fucking resplendent as fuck; I don’t find things romantic, but that was. I don’t think you meant it that way.
I don’t know if there were red flags. I’m usually so good at red flags. I’m a side-stepper. I get away from red flags. Well, really, I don’t get in situations that have flags of any color. I walk alone. Always.
I just thought you were my break from that. From solitude. I thought you were going to want to hang out with me. I thought you were going to fall in like with my mind. I thought you were going to find parts of me sexy — ethereal parts, not cliche body parts.
Nope. I’m back to solitude. I like this. I keep reminding myself how I didn’t really want a relationship any way. I am low maintenance. I keep reminding myself. I don’t need more. I’m better on my own.
This is my punishment for getting weirdly hopeful. It’s like that Gnarles Barkley song “Crazy.”
Hahaha, bless your soul.
You naive little thing. You thought a guy liked you.
Man, I’m getting adept at condescending myself.
I walk alone. Always. And every time I forget that, the price I pay goes up. I need to stop wanting. It’s only going to cost me.
okay seriously if you’re in a relationship or even a friendship and you find yourself spending more time crying out of sadness or arguing with them, leave them. i don’t care if they’re a modern day aphrodite/adonis or a gift bestowed upon you by the gods. toxic people are dangerous and i highly advise cutting them out of your life and finding someone who makes you laugh until you snort your drink out your nose instead.